Comfort Is Killing You! Honest Advice to Someone who Feels Behind in Life
Think you’re not ready for success? Think again. This surprising shift will have you taking action immediately.
“Success isn’t about waiting for perfect conditions. It’s about taking action, even when you’re uncertain.”
12 years ago I was where — standing on the scale at 100 lbs overweight, struggling with myself, physically exhausted, and wanting to give up. This was, literally, a living hell and a war: every day was futile and there seemed no way out. But today, I live a life that I considered impossible, and this all happened right after I got a solution to three basic yet crucial issues. Today, I want to tell to you: here are the solutions to your problems so that you can get out of your mess and acquire your goals.
Fear of Judgment
The first mistake that I made was failure to overcome my fears. One feared being labeled, not belonging, and not being understood. The reinforcements of rejection were so strong that I found myself paralyzed. But here’s what I learned: It means, that if your fear of being misunderstood may overwhelm your desire for growth, you’ll remain stagnant. How many times did I have to pin myself up and cry, do I want to remain in my comfort zone with people I do not look up to just because society labeled me?
What I realized is much more unpalatable but inescapably real-sometimes to get ahead, it is necessary to be ready to be unpopular. This is particularly the case because growth can only be achieved when one seeks to make adjustments that will be perceived as negative by the masses. What needs to change is the people who are ready to chop off the limb in which we all conveniently reside, such as Elon Musk. He received teasing for being a dreamer, but he had no time for that because he was not concerned by conformity. He was goal-oriented.
Lack of Willingness to Do the Hard Work
The second difficult I had to solve was the one that was connected with a lack of desire to do the hard work. Oh yeah, everybody wants success in their lives but in actuality,y nobody wants to work for it. This, I have observed when recruiting other people into my organization. They tell employers that they are looking for employment when in a real sense, they lack the willingness to make necessary sacrifices necessary for job delivery. If you want success, suffering, and sacrifice are just the prices that you are willing to pay or decisions that you are willing to make. Success requires sacrifice.
Outcome vs Process
Finally, I have been forced to shift from outcome-orientated thinking to process-orientated thinking. I think it was not the number of pounds shed or the goals achieved it was simply about waking up and putting on my shoes, even if it was for a short walk. To create meaningful change as an effective practitioner, embrace the process; the struggles, the failures or even the accomplishments in the process. Ask yourself: action, action, action… what are you willing to ‘give’ in order to make your goals a reality? In accordance with this, there is to remember that no one achieved something for which he or she did not pay a price.
Now, back to the present day. This may sound better than setting goals; more than just saying the right things, commitment entails doing them. That’s why, for instance, if you decide to move for a job, it means that you are very committed. And the best evidence towards it is the sacrifices, the things you’re willing to let go of. Pick your goals not by what you would like to get out of it, but by what you are willing to give up.
Simple Exercise
Here’s a simple exercise for you:
Write down your goal.
Ask yourself: What do I have to give up to reach this goal?
Are you willing to let go of those things?
If not, the goal may not be for you. Prioritize your dreams over comfort.
Self-Belief: The Fourth Challenge
The 3rd challenge people encounter is the issue of self-belief. Self-belief. Many people who hear about confidence think that doing something to act and finally get confidence is getting something that they were not quite sure that they could do, and exposing themselves to something new. It’s not about getting good at what makes you comfortable — it’s about shoving yourself out of your comfort zone.
Every step from ceasing the personal training business to starting a new project has meant confidence I never possessed. It was, however, when taking action in the presence of uncertainty that one developed that confidence. More confidence comes from practice not from precision.
Basically when people look at a situation and say I am not ready for this — the culprit is the brain. No one goes prepared when confronted by something worth doing.
Action causes competency, competency causes confidence.
The secret? Develop the ability to act with uncertainty. Do not sit back and hope for the ideal scenario and all the right questions and answers. Those things will never come. Stop waiting for perfect, it will never come it just gets worse.
Imperfect Action
Probably the greatest paradox that life has to offer is that getting more failure meant getting more success. By this principle, you cannot be successful until you begin to act regardless of how you may feel and how much you may know. It’s not about achieving perfection, it is about growing from our mistake.
You may be wondering the following: “If only other people realized how confusing or scared I feel.” That’s your brain making you think that you are somehow different or that nobody will ever find out. You’re not. We all feel that way. Already you have enough of information. What you need now is not perfect inaction.
The question to ask yourself is, “What sin can I commit this week?” Being an open question, this question enables you to stop thinking and act. It is going to work because when you take imperfect action, it is going to help you with all of those things. Not as good as perfect, perhaps, but it’s got to be better than where you were.
It also should be noted that change is a procedure rather than an event or a action or an activity or a step. No one will be a failure once only and that too will never ever get success again. Similarly, you can never be an overnight success and then continue to be successful for the rest of your time. Success means that work has to be consistent with feedbacks and short/long term changes.
Start small. Take imperfect action. And, of course, confidence will come through this process. Self confidence however is confidence derived from discipline, from action taken behind the scenes and faith in the system. Hard work will get you to the stage where confidence comes on its own.
Last and least, stop waiting for approval. Success is about presence, which mean constant action, acquisition of skill or expertise. Confidence, yes confidence will follow ,but where and when… The first step has to be taken . What people do is what counts, not what they have desired to do.